Ook so today i've realized something that i wish i hadn't

i don't know if i'm capable of having a long distance relationship.. Well i guess i am physically capable, i wouldn't die in one or anything but i do not like it. at all. it makes me feel unfulfilled
i know i'm a pretty needy girl tho.. this stupid distance is just making me question and think negatively too much
I should be happy that i've found someone that i actually like.. That's a lot for me.. and i REALLY like him. I haven't felt like this in a long time.. i should enjoy that but i'm distracted with the distance thing..
ooh man i need to give myself a pep talk or something hahahhaa this is ridiculous.. i making myself insane.. i am awesome.. TOO awesome- too awesome for lloooove hahaha

so ima write some things about richard that makes me smile so i'm not negative
1) he still calls me pumpkin even tho i thought he was joking about it
2) sleeping with him next to me
3) he doesnt mind that all i wanna do is sleep when he's there b/c i'm tired from my ridiculously busy week
4) he likes me too!! : )
5) the first time we held hands he asked if it was ok first
6) the first time we kissed he asked as well
7) he's a gentleman
8) he holds my doors open! : )
9) he thinks i'm funny
10) he has the LOUDEST BEST laugh
11) he misses me
12) I can completely be myself with him and he doesn't find it annoying- he actually likes it for some CRAZY reason
13) he lets me make fun of him constantly
14) his last name is CUMMINGS hahahhaahhaa dick cummings
15) he always tries to tell me he's not sleeping when i call even tho i KNOW he is.. and makes cute little noises to protest me saying 'i'll let you go back to bed'

okay that'lll hold me over for a little while. ima read this when i get sad.. okay i can do long distance now hahahaha
i just need to remind myself that it is MORE than worth it to wait to see this great guy :)